Feeling Lost in My 3-Year Relationship – Need Advice on Reconnecting with My Girlfriend (25F)

Feeling Lost in My 3-Year Relationship – Need Advice on Reconnecting with My Girlfriend (25F)

I'm a 25M, and I've been with my girlfriend (25F) for almost three years. Over the past year, things have been getting strange between us, and I'm starting to feel a lack of commitment from her side. It's like she's no longer interested in meeting in person. We've always been in a long-distance relationship, but we used to make sure to meet at least once every month for 4-5 days, sometimes even more than that. When I was studying abroad for a year, I travelled back to meet and spend time with her, and she took a lot of risks to make it work, too. Now that I'm permanently back and there's a chance to meet whenever we want, we're not meeting. Both our families are unaware of our relationship, and she has more trouble travelling from home due to endless questions from her family. I suggested we meet by the end of December. Still, she told me to focus on my upcoming competitive exam and said we'd meet in January during a friend's wedding—which seemed like the perfect excuse for her to travel safely. But January came and went, and there was no mention of meeting each other. She also says we must get married to stop this longing and gap. She makes many plans but then forgets them or starts planning differently later. Recently, I fell kind of sick, and she knew about it. She barely asked me throughout the day whether I was okay or not. She only inquired during our routine video call when she saw I was unwell. At the peak of my illness, I said, "The pain is severe, and I'm feeling so bad." She responded, "Then, do you plan to visit a doctor?" This moment hurt me more than anything. I haven't spoken to her about it because I don't know whether she'd go silent over this. Secondly, am I being too emotionally dependent on her? Am I not supposed to yearn for care and love from my partner? I grew up in a family where love and care were over-given—is that an issue here? Two months ago, there was another incident where she just assumed and judged me based on something (I won't get into the details). It hurt me, and when I told her about it, we barely had any amicable moments for a week—we could barely speak. I know I played a part in it; I felt sad and judged, and sharing my feelings only aggravated the issue. I mentioned to her that we need good communication whenever issues happen while respecting space if required. But whenever a problem arises, she never shares anything about it until I bring it up, and things stay awkward. I've been fighting for this relationship, but I'm starting to lose my self-worth because she rarely apologizes for these incidents. Not receiving any closure makes me feel more and more suppressed. When I initiated the breakup talk, I told her that I was ready to try and suggested couples therapy, but she said she didn't want to relive these sad memories. At this point, I don't know what to do. On top of all this, at the start of this month, she attended an event and came back happy and excited, telling me that I should start practising an art form I used to do until recently. But it was more of a command and demand than a request, as these are personal things for me. I know she yearns to see me perform like I used to a few years back, and it's out of genuine intent, but the way she put it felt wrong. To an extent, she told me that she wouldn't marry me unless I performed the art. Even while saying this, I understand that she loves me. However, the care, the presence, and the effort to improve this relationship have been severely lacking. She's been going through some stuff recently—she has PCOS and has been trying to work on it by working out. However, I see that she has serious issues with procrastination. Rather than seeking help with the underlying problem, she's forcing herself to do things but ends up relapsing. She's gorgeous and fun to be around. I enjoy spending time with her and am trying to accept her for who she is today, but this isn't helping me or our relationship. Should I say she's being nonchalant? I'm posting here because I need genuine perspectives, especially from women. Is there something I'm missing? Is there anything else I can do to restore the spark? **TL;DR:** I'm a 25M in a 3-year long-distance relationship with my girlfriend (25F). We used to meet regularly, even taking risks to see each other, but now that I'm back permanently, we're not meeting. She seems less committed and avoids addressing issues unless I bring them up, and recent incidents have left me feeling hurt and suppressed. She suggests marriage but doesn't follow through with plans. When I was sick, she showed little concern, which hurt me deeply. I'm feeling like I'm losing my self-worth and questioning if I'm being too emotionally dependent. I'm seeking advice on reconnecting and bringing back the spark in our relationship. Am I missing something, or is there more I can do?

Get ready to meet the new Samsung Galaxy S series, your true AI companion. Save this post or visit u/Samsung_Mobile at 10am PST.

Get ready to meet the new Samsung Galaxy S series, your true AI companion. Save this post or visit u/Samsung_Mobile at 10am PST.

Need to fix/reupholster chair. Thoughts?

So I got a chair second hand and just need to fix or replace the cover. It doesn't have to be perfect; just functional. I was thinking I might just cut it off and cover it in fabric without sewing it or anything if that'd work, but wanted a second opinion.

Help me

I'm torn on what to do in the game Should I buy the ice cream maker or fix the net maker? Which one’s gonna give me my money’s worth? I’ve only got like 26,000